Thursday, February 9, 2012

110. The human

I'm an 18 year-old girl. You may see me laugh, making jokes, jumping & get crazy everywhere. Being so happy and cool no matter what is happening around me. I pretend to be blurry sometimes to make sure other people happy. I lend my ears for anyone who need me, to hear their problems. I share my stories with anyone I want. All in all, you may see me as a girl without any worry towards anything if you don't really know me.

Some of the people in my life may see me or look at me as a good girl, active girl, brilliant girl who knows how to play with numbers and words. Kinda gifted and have cool character. Have a bit of knowledge in music although I never attend music school to learn and play the music. Have beautiful eyes, beautiful smile, perfect body shape. Some of them maybe see that I'm extraordinary and attractive but I didn't do anything, those 'gedik - gedik' stuff to attract attentions. I'm just being myself. Trust me.

But there's also some of them who see me as a bad girl, 'gedik' girl who don't know how to do housework. Hey, I know how to do housework but not tidying. I'm lazy to tidy up. That's the reason. Just that. There's also people who get jealous with what I have. And what they do? They bring me down, they push me down. You might see and say that this is not a big problem. You just have to ignore what they say, keep strong, be positive, take all of those offensive words as a motivation. Just take it lightly. You may say that but you're not in my shoes.

I believe a human is like a nail. Nail is so strong. Made up of steel or iron. Hard to be bend. Same like human. They are strong. I know. Everyone is strong, determined, tough, positive. But nail, if you let it stay under the sky of sunshine and rain in a long time, they will rust. Once they are rust, they are brittle. Not strong as their originally. And if you knock it to wood or wall, they will penetrate into it but sometimes they will bend, crooked. For human, if you rain them with problems, they will be upset, depress and in the end, they are not strong anymore. They have broken down. And if you keep on pressuring them, let them feel insecure with your words and actions, they may fall down no matter how tough they were before. Believe in me. We're not forever strong. Someday we will be broken down.

As for me, I'm just a normal girl. I don't have those branded stuff that can make people impressed with me. I'm a very 'kampung' girl who live in an almost collapse house full of termites, who have some irresponsible person in my life, who doesn't know how to wear makeup, who have tanned skin with full of pimple scars face, who sometimes regret her past, who don't know how to drive a car, who didn't wasted almost half an hour in front of the mirror just to look good before go out, who don't have any idea how being loved is all about, who are not feminine enough to be a guy dream girl, who don't really know how to style my pashmina, who sick of the people who always try to gain fame in any way. My life is not so awesome but I'm grateful with everything I have.

Thank you.


fndrocka said...


princess of chemistryy .. ☺ said...

awesome!!ske sgt bc ur blog..=) and if u dont mind , do email me..slm perkenalan dr Miri:)